Are you Married BUT Still NOT a Co-Parent?

       Girls are (often) raised to grow up to be no more than a wife and a mother.  Many of us are force-fed the mantra of becoming a mother "the right way" being that we must marry BEFORE we bring forth another life.  What is NOT emphasized is boys being raised into men that will co-parent with their WIVES.  Too many little boys grow up with mothers that handle all things child-related and form the idea that this is how a relationship is supposed to work.  That as long as he provides financially (regardless of the employment status of the spouse) he is a great father.  

     These men PRAISE the sacrifices of their mothers as their fathers sat on the sidelines as if they were parental spectators.

     This begets current marriages where the only difference between a "Mrs." mother and an unwed mother is a piece of paper.  Too many MARRIED women are also single mothers within their union "under God".  Left to figure things out when it comes to their children under their spouse is in need of a PR moment or ego boost for lurking eyes online.  Men within our society have been conditioned to believe that fatherhood means being a friend and disciplinarian to their children...on command.  They see nothing wrong with their spouse handling all other aspects of child-rearing, including emotional labor, medical care, education, and being the example of being taken for granted.  

    Hold your, "not every father", this isn't for those that woke up and grew into knowing what makes a healthy dynamic for all within a [core] family.

     Therefore, is "doing it the right way" merely for bragging rights and to avoid public scrutiny and shame? Think about it...the gossip mills will not become extinct towards you simply because you signed a paper and wore a pretty dress.  There are always wagging tongues regarding how you run your household...what your husband does and does not do for/to you...how your children act.  The SAME (for the most part) critiques are hurled as those that were "loose in the caboose".  So maybe...just maybe...do things in the order and manner that will be the best for YOU.  Find a partner that embodies the definition of their title.